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Sunday 29 April 2018

How to Parent Kids During Ramadan When You're Exhausted

Ramadan can be a challenging time for mothers. We have our normal routines of taking care of the children, the house, and maybe work outside and we have to do it all without getting the energy from food. In addition, we have to worrying over what meals to cook and getting it all ready for suhur and iftar. It can be very exhausting. How can we fulfill our duties during Ramadan when we're so exhausted?

The answer is to simplify and limit what we do in Ramadan so we're less likely to be exhausted. We can then have more time for our ibadah. Below are 5 things that you can do.

1. Set a Routine
Decide now what your day is going to be like. If you have to then draw up a timetable. This way, you'll know what to do and when to do it so you'll be on track. When people don't have a plan they tend to be frazzled because of the uncertainty.

Block off time for cooking, housework, Quran, resting and connecting with your child.

2. Take a Nap
This is a sunnah and it's a much needed one to rest your body and tired mind. It doesn't have to be long. You'll only need 10 minutes for a power nap but if you have time then 20 minutes is the maximum. 

If you're a stay at home mum then you can nap when your child naps. Do not use this time to cook or clean. You'll find that once you've napped then you'll feel more energised or at least you'll feel better than you did before. You'll be ready to take on the rest of the day.

3. Cook One Meal
Culturally, people cook far too much food during Ramadan. But really all you need is one meal for dinner (and the leftovers can be eaten for suhur). Who can eat that much after a day of fasting anyway? If you overeat then you'll feel bloated which makes it harder to do ibadah such as praying the many rakats of Tarawih.

It's a sunnah to break the fast with dates and a drink of water. But if you really must cook another dish then let it be a small snack to go with the dates and water instead of the array of delectable morsels that usually accompany the breaking fast. 

Remember to keep it simple so you won't be exhausted just preparing and cooking all day.

4. Talk Less
Try to talk less. For one thing, you'll be less likely to yell or argue if you try not to talk. This is exhausting in itself. For another, you'll conserve your energy for something for useful such as reading Quran.

What can you do instead of talking? You can use your gestures and body language. Try smiling and nodding when your child starts to argue or backtalk. When you don't talk back your child will stop talking as there's no response. When your child does something right, give him the thumbs up or a high 5 along with a big smile. 

Think of other ways to convey your message silently.

5. Engage Your Child
Find or schedule something for your child to do that he'll find engaging because if he's absorbed in doing something than that means you can relax and do other things.

If your child is young then take him to the park or outside in your back garden and let him run about. If it's to a park then you can relax while you do thikr and keep an eye on him. If it's your backyard then you can take your Quran out and read.

If your child is older then have him memorise a surah or juz of the Quran. This will keep him busy doing something rewarding instead of playing on the computer or electronics all day. As an incentive for memorising, if you don't like to give a material reward then give your child a voucher or coupon to be used at a later time such as choosing an activity for the family to do. When your child is busy memorising, you can spend your time memorising as well or reading the Quran.

For these activities, you'd need to schedule them into your routine.

Hopefully, these 5 tips will make it easier for you to parent your child during Ramadan. Remember to take care of yourself. If you're too exhausted then the whole household will not function so well. 

May you have a rewarding Ramadan full of blessings for you and your family.

Other Ramadan articles:
Strengthen Family Bonds during Ramadan


  1. This is a great article and a much needed reminder for all the mothers out there. Inshallah a blessed Ramadan for everyone!

  2. Brief and to the point! Like any busy mom would want it! Great advice! Reposted on G+.

  3. This is such a lovely list... wish I had this earlier! Hehe... when my kids were younger, I would come from work all exhausted and they just wouldn't sleep. Initially I used to get so frustrated, later I realized, that just telling them that "ummi is going to sleep, you can play but don't disturb me" allowed me to get the real power nap I needed to push me through the day...

    1. Good idea. We have to do what we have to do to get our power nap.

  4. Some great tips masha'Allah. Now the children are older they can generally entertain themselves so that gives me a bit of a break! Alhamdulillah have never gone over aboard with the cooking so don't have to worry about that

  5. These are such great tips for Muslim Parents! Thanks for sharing!

  6. You know, I dont have small kids anymore mine are all grown, but your tips are still useful for me. Drawing up a timetable, definetly need to do this as I lead a busy lifestyle and it always helps to write and tick off tasks to make sure they get done. I wish I could take a power nap It would probably do me good, I will try. Thanks for the benefical tips.

    1. Yes do try a power nap. I always feel refreshed when I wake up.

  7. I'm a mama of four and not worried about my older 3 children, but I'm a bit nervous about my 2 year old! It's always a challenge to keep him entertained!

    1. That's understandable as children that age are full of energy. Hope all goes well this Ramadan with you.

  8. I’m not a mom or married yet. Hats off to all those mommies who take care of the hour and the kids. It can be very difficult at times but you his pull through. Kudos to you all